Sometimes You Choose Solitude, Sometime It Chooses You

Solitude, I believe that sometimes it chooses you, not the other way round.

You have so many people around but no one chooses you. And all that you are left with? Loneliness. Yes.

What option do you have other than either choosing to loathe in loneliness or making that alone time the time for your growth?

What’s the point of loathing when this time can be a great tool for making something out of your life?

We crave for free time and me time and when we really get it, we start complaining of feeling lonely or left out.

We can’t change people or make them love us. What we can do is love ourselves and our own company a little more.

We can embrace the solitude with open arms and do things that bring peace and joy to our soul like meditation, journaling, reading, self-care and what not.

I often feel lonely but then I remember I have so much to do that when I’m around people, I keep seeking some hours for myself.

I stay up till late so that I can give those hours to my personal growth.

I work on my goals past midnight. When the world is asleep and my mind is awake.

I am also a toddler mom and the only time I get for myself is when she falls asleep at night. Her day-time naps help me get done with other chores.

But do I feel included during the day time? Nope. I feel just as lonely, as alone. So, what do I do to cope with that feeling? I either play with my girl, repeat my affirmations in my mind, journal, read, or whatever I can without being interrupted by her. Like if I use my laptop, she’s gonna want to use it too because it makes her curious.

Choosing yourself when you become a mom is tough, but it’s also crucial.

I think that’s why solitude chose me. So that I could choose myself in those moments of aloneness.

I connect with God because when no one’s around you, God is.

I don’t know how to close this piece. It has no beginning, no middle, no end. Just some broken sentences that come from my heart. Random thoughts woven together.

Some experiences can’t be put into words. I think it’s one such.

Loneliness is different for all, but at the heart, it feels exhausting until you learn to embrace it and make the most out of it.