Dear Impostor Syndrome, Leave Me Alone Please

Photo by Laura Chouette on Unsplash

Dear Impostor Syndrome, 

You know I avoid people and their company, but do you know someone I want to avoid even more? Yes, it's you. Before any more insults, please leave me alone.
Thanks in advance.

Have you heard of impostor syndrome?

I bet that even if you haven't heard the term, you must have faced it at some or the other point in your life.

It's my constant companion. It chooses to never leave my side. Even if it decides to go on a break, it hardly for a few hours, and then, it comes knocking hard on the door of my life.

I tell you, the only and only thing that's stopping me from living the life of my dreams is this syndrome alone.

I am capable and I know I can do anything I set my eyes on. I felt doubtful while writing the previous sentence. That self-doubt, that feeling that I am lying despite knowing deep down that it's true, it is an example of impostor syndrome.

Impostor syndrome is a feeling that sucks all the confidence out of you, it's a feeling you get when you think you don't belong where you wish to belong, like you didn't earn your seat at the table, like you tricked people into believing in your abilities but you aren't really capable of the position that's offered to you.

Impostor syndrome pushes you into a dark abyss of self-doubt and self-questioning.

My husband often tries to help me overcome my impostor syndrome. Here's what he told me a few days ago when I was charging someone a low price for a writing project and he asked me to charge according to my skills.

So, I said to him, "what if I charge more and they find someone else to do the job?" To which my husband replied, "that's okay. Tell them that you can get it done by someone else and then come back to me, and see the difference in their work and mine."

I was impressed with this confidence but it didn't really help me overcome my self-doubts, except that I quoted my pay rates and got paid for what my work was worth.

The thing is, I wasn't ready to accept that they'll pay me the amount I was demanding but I was ready to let go of the project if the demands weren't met. I still didn't believe enough in my work.

I am trying to use affirmations to get over this syndrome so that I can have a successful freelancing career without any self-doubts kicking me off the track.

Below are some affirmations I gathered from the internet and the ones that spoke to me. I repeat them and write them in my journal. Let's see what the results would be.

I am a strong and capable person.

I can tackle any obstacle that comes my way.

I trust in my abilities.

I deserve to be paid for what my work is worth.

I and my skills are irreplaceable.

I can do anything I set my mind and heart to.

I am always open to learning more.

I don't have to be perfect to be effective.

I am enough and my voice matters.

Affirmations work for me but there's no specific time period for how long it takes for them to work. It all depends on how much time does it take you to believe an affirmation as your reality even if it hasn't shown up yet.

It can take you days, weeks, or even months.

I recommend trying daily affirmations with all your heart and faith for, at least, one month before you decide to give up and think they don't work.

Journaling has always been my savior and now that I have found the culprit, the so-called impostor syndrome, journaling might help me overcome that too.

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